So, I don’t have any pictures, and I don’t have lots of stories, but I have not been able to get a thing started on my sermon, and I finally figured out why. Today would have been my father’s 81st birthday. He hated a fuss on his birthday. My grandmother told me a story about how she had a surprise party for him when he was young and he ran out of the house. He wanted nothing to do with it. I don’t understand, and I was so astounded by the story that I never thought to ask any questions. I don’t know if it was a party with older relatives or young friends. I never did learn how old he was at the time, I just can picture him at about 8 or 10 running out of the house and into the shelter of trees near by.
I remember turning 54 and realizing that I was the same age that he was when he passed away. Each year I am always surprised that I continue to age when he didn’t. His father didn’t live that long either. Each of them died in a way that should have been prevented. I mean neither had a disease like cancer or heart attack. One died in a car accident that shouldn’t have happened. The other took his own life or so we think. We will never know the truth of either. We aren’t even sure who was driving when that accident happened. My mother always contended that my father wasn’t at the wheel when his dad died, but he was covering for the other person in the car. How do you survive those things. How do you lose a son, who you planned your whole life around. How do you take your pride and joy and lay him in a grave. My parents did that.
Sometimes, I don’t like blogging and posting what comes out as my fingers dance across the computer keys, but I have to post it. I have to get this out so that I can move on and finish my other work. Nothing will flow until this is out-of-the-way. So, I say sorry to those who end up reading this and wondering what it is about. It just is. I am trying to write on the topic of doing not just believing. I am also trying to write on the topic of doing it with sincerity. To be honest. To just say we believe in God without doing something for others is just lip service. If we are honest about our faith and our beliefs, we will go out and do something about it.
I always feel like such a hypocrite telling others about faith and how to act and believe because I don’t really do anything, I don’t do enough. I don’t share what I believe enough. But that isn’t really true. I am finally starting to see that I do share. I just don’t stand on street corners or radio shows or bring it up in every conversation I have with someone. I find it much easier to write about it than talk about it. And, mostly I find that of all the times I put on that Pastor robe and stand behind the pulpit, the time that is easiest to speak what I really believe is when there is a coffin and grieving people in the building. Perhaps it is because I can relate to them so well. Grieving the loss of family is something that a person never totally gets over. My father has been gone for 26 years, and at the end of this year, on New Year’s Eve, my brother will be gone 52 years.
I think that I didn’t believe that what I do is important until a read a recent post by Mama the Reader. She is listed in the pictures of those I follow. Scroll over the pictures and see the names that pop up to find her. She is a college professor who has recently become a single mother. Her courage is remarkable. She finally admitted that she is more than just a teacher of a few classes at a college. I seriously believed her that she just taught a class or two and I wondered how she was surviving, and now she finally admitted it. She is a real professor. She downplayed herself because she said that is what we women do too often. She is so right.
I keep thinking of myself as a no one. I only substitute teach and am only a part-time pastor. I don’t have a degree for the pastor thing, but I was a religion-philosophy major in college. That was my second major. I always thought my college degree was a joke because I majored in Health-Physical Education and Recreation. It was a joke major according to the pre-professionals and the accounting majors. We were especially considered stupid by those in biology because our kinesiology course was in the PE department and not with the sciences. But I digress.
Mostly I wanted to post this today to just get it out. Maybe now I can come up with something worth saying tomorrow as we look at the scriptures of James 1:17-27 and Mark 7:1-8, 14-15 and 21-23. Hope you stop back to see if it was worth the effort. For now, may God Bless you for taking the time to read and think about what your own beliefs are and what brought you to them.